


Another Answer

by herbailiwick



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Regret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-24
Updated: 2013-01-24
Packaged: 2017-11-26 16:31:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/652236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/herbailiwick/pseuds/herbailiwick
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><a href="http://johncroftianlullaby.tumblr.com/post/36791962147/winter-drawing-writing-challenge">Winter Writing/Drawing Challenge</a> Day 18 - Hibernate/Sleep, though to be honest, it's not explicitly wintry.</p>
<p>Cas asks Sam's advice.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Another Answer

Sam looked up and jumped slightly. "Cas?" He frowned. He blinked the sleep from his eyes.

The line of Cas's mouth tightened slightly in apology.

"Um. Hi, what's...what's up?"

Cas looked away. Sam sat up, a look of gentle concern on his face. 

"Is this about a hunt or something? Is...is it Dean?" He was becoming more concerned. 

Cas met Sam's gaze again. "I. Um. I was just watching you sleep," he admitted.

"Oh." Sam relaxed, but he did ask, "Why?" He could recall Cas sitting by Dean while he slept, though never for long.

Cas narrowed his eyes slightly in thought. "Can I ask your advice, Sam?"

"Yeah! Yeah, sure," Sam said, pushing the covers away and coming to sit on the edge of the bed near the angel. "Yeah."

"How do you look at yourself in the mirror, after...?" He didn't finish the thought, but anything Sam could have filled the blank with would have worked.

Sam moved an arm as if to physically comfort Cas, but he thought better of it, resting his forearm against his leg again, swallowing. "Well," he said. "Um. It's never easy, at first. I've been wrong before," he nods. "I've messed up. A lot. But, I think it's important to keep trying. And faith, praying helps," he admitted softly, as if Cas might judge him for that.

Cas didn't judge him for that at all. He considered Sam's words. "Do you still believe my father is out there, Sam?" he asked, also quietly.

"I do," Sam sighed. "Yeah, I really do. And, um." He ran a hand through his hair. "I can't help but see it, in how things work out sometimes. I don't think he's just hiding. I think he's...working, still. Helping. Like you."

Cas turned sharply toward Sam. "You think I'm still helping?"

"Yeah," Sam breathed. "I mean...um. Yeah. You know?"

Cas frowned slightly. No, he didn't know, not anymore.

"How...are you, Cas? How are you feeling?" Sam asked, brow furrowing in concern again.

Cas looked down at his hands, folding them together idly. "I want to...hibernate," he said slowly. "I want to cease existing until it's easier than it is now." He bowed his head. He knew how weak it sounded.

A cautious hand rested on his shoulder. He turned toward Sam a little more, questioning.

"I know that feeling," Sam said. "Dean knows that feeling too. It's rough right now. It might be rough for a really long time. But," he said, removing his hand, noting Cas's disappointment, replacing the contact and leaning in slightly as he added, "you can't get better if you hibernate. I'm not saying time isn't going to help; it is. It really is. But you have to make changes too, in order to, you know...look at yourself in the mirror again."

Cas sat very still and looked at Sam for a long moment. Cautiously, he opened his arms, looking warily at Sam as if he expected Sam to refuse him again. Sam leaned in without hesitation, though. He embraced the angel, coaxing him to lean against him, to find a little comfort. He could feel the tension in Cas easing a little.

"We all make mistakes, Cas," Sam whispered. "Just, some of them are apocalyptic."

Cas gripped Sam Winchester just a little more tightly. Perhaps hibernation wasn't the answer after all.


End file.
